As previously noted it was at the gym that my beloved iPhone hit the floor and smashed itself out of my life – an event that took some weeks to get over and even some NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) visualisation techniques from one of my new friends (Yay! I have some) which went something like this
– can you see yourself dropping the phone? Yes – so imagine that exact moment (Owww don’t like thinking about this so much – not helping!)
– Now get the picture in your mind, and halve the size of the photo you have made (Okaaaayyy – not sure where this is going)
– Now the photo is at half size, blur the picture so its not in full focus (soft lighting is now going to lessen my pain apparently!)
– Now the picture is blurry and half the size – reduce the size some more
– Now put the picture into black and white
– Now move it to the very back of your brain – far far back in your memory where you can’t see it so much anymore (not sure where the back of my brain was – seems tough to find most parts of my brain these days)
Do you know what – it actually helped! She of course thought I was crazy to be obsessing over something as silly as smashing my phone (might I add she was able to go home and log into her laptop from any part of her home or garden through her broadband wireless so could not possibly feel my pain) and I thought it was crazy to make my pain into a picture, make it fuzzy, take the colour out and pack it away in the back of my brain (as if I even knew where that was) – but somehow it worked a little. I still missed my phone desperately but somehow not quite so badly. Who knew – perhaps I should look into NLP some more there might be lot of ways it can help me if I am particularly open to visual imagery, but then again maybe not. A little later we worked on picturing chocolate tasting like kidneys and liver, that worked momentarily but unfortunately I am still on the chocolate train to bigger size jeans on a regular basis. Which is one of the many reasons why I needed to go to the gym in the first place.
Anyway – hot of the heels of the iphone debacle (when I was using the backup ‘pink phone’) the gym caused me more grief – or I caused me more grief – I prefer to try to blame others when I can – as you can probably tell by now, see what you think. I was having a perfectly pleasant morning in the gym and realized I had to hustle a little bit so that I would make my 9am golf lesson on time. I gathered all my items, ensuring they were correctly stowed – couldn’t afford to lose another phone at this point and hurried down the steps through the exit turnstile and out the automatic sliding doors of the gym – that have a slight, tiny, probably 2 inch step – which on this occasion I misjudged completely and went over on my ankle and twirling about with the large likelihood of sprawling myself all over the entrance to the gym. Oh no I thought (hindsight is a wonderful thing – should have gone with the sprawl) I am not falling over at the entrance to the gym – so I gave myself a mighty twist and put all that weight on my ankle which was at a somewhat disturbing angle and kept myself upright and all my possessions in hand. Immediately I felt the most frightening pain – it really really hurt and tears came whether I was liking them or not.
I limped to the side of the entrance with giant sobs escaping me when I could get a breath in. Really – this was worse – if I had gone with sprawling option at least I could have jumped up quickly and moved away. This was going to take a long time to hobble to the car – and it was a manual. I wasn’t sure if my swelling ankle could take the gear changing required. Ouch ouch ouch – cry cry cry. People rushed at me from everywhere – can we help you, are you OK? Yeah – I’m fine – that’s why I have the world’s greatest cankle growing before your eyes……
I did manage to hobble away at last and hop to the car – looking totally ridiculous – get in and then wonder what I was doing??? Had to get back out to take my shoe off as it felt like my circulation was being cut off and I couldn’t negotiate the bending and twisting while actually in the drivers seat. In the end I was 20 mins late for my golf lesson. The golf pro – bless him – got me a bag of ice a chair and then I sat down with him and the girl whose lesson was before mine (and was well chuffed with her extra time J) and had a discussion about religion, atheism and agnostics which did help somewhat in taking my mind off the issue at hand. When my time was up – another punter to teach – I moved outside to watch some other friends on the driving range (I think I have mentioned before that golf is a social skill where I live now right?) before I had to do the inevitable and get back in the car and drive to pick my 3-year-old up from school. Ouch ouch ouch – all hurt a lot.
Having never twisted, sprained or ‘twinged’ (apparently not a real word according to spell-check) my ankle before I had no idea what to expect in terms of recovery times or healing process. I thought – she’ll be right in a few days, Wednesday now – back at the gym probably next Monday. I was only off by 3 and a half weeks!
Firstly the cankle was so large that I couldn’t really wear any shoes other than flip flops (I know that’s an English term but Aussies would say ‘thongs’ and then there are other nationalities that think a ‘thong’ is something else entirely) – so I was restricted to one type of shoe attire – but given my shoe collection is not too extensive that was hardly the worst thing.
The first week I couldn’t sleep on my stomach as when you lie on your stomach your legs are out behind you and your ankle has to bend somewhat to accommodate being flat on the bed – NO NO NO – that did not work. I LIKE sleeping on my stomach, the only other times I haven’t been able to do it has been when I have been in the second and third trimesters of my pregnancies and I didn’t like it then and I didn’t like it now.
Every morning when I woke up I had to hop down the stairs as it took me about an hour of being up and about to be able to put any weight on it – and plant it firmly on the ground. This was usually just in time to leave the house to do the school run in my MANUAL car. After which the cankle throbbed for a good few hours – until it was time to do the next run and pick up the little buggers – I mean my precious children at two different locations at two different times.
It was depressing so it required extra attention to myself like chocolate! My love of the Cadbury Whisper found a new high and if you are eating chocolate you might as well drink soft drink to get the full sugar high effect! My drink of choice is Coke – the real thing – no Diet, Lite or Zero please – poor imitations. I was buzzing daily and it wasn’t with exercise endorphins.
After two weeks I was somewhat concerned about the fact that it didn’t seem to be getting much better, so after much prodding from my husband who had to put up with my daily moaning and morning hopping acts I decided to go to the doctor. I was a bit embarrassed about going – you see it had swollen up – and still was swollen but it had never actually bruised so there was nothing except the swelling to show. I didn’t think that was enough to warrant a visit but I caved as I couldn’t stand it anymore either. I could only get an appointment at a time when I had my 6-year-old son in tow as I had picked him up from school, so off we went together. He was very concerned and I had to promise him this wasn’t a sneaky doctors visit for him – it was for me and was about my ankle as it was quite sore and didn’t seem to be getting better. He seemed to be reassured by this information that we weren’t going to hand him over for some random booster shot (his greatest fear and he is quite right that I would never tell him in advance about it, I’ve been there done that) – all the necessary information in hand he arrived at the doctor’s office and announced to the receptionist –
My mum needs an x-ray – she has a broken ankle
No no – I don’t really, I would just like to have the doctor have a look at it
My mum needs an x-ray – she has a broken ankle
No not really
Doctor examines the cankle – does this hurt? Does this hurt? Does this hurt? Where does it hurt the most?
Anyway – the outcome is that it isn’t broken – no x-ray required but it is quite severe ligament damage given the way that it looks and what has happened. The only difference between when it is broken and ligament damage is the sympathy you get from others. Ligament damage can be very painful (Thank you! I know!) and it can take a long time to recover from.
What are you taking for it?
Taking – I should be taking something?
Here are some anti-inflammatory thingies (although being a doctor he didn’t say thingies) – make sure you take them every day for 10 days and it should give you some relief. Do you want some painkillers as well?
Ooh – the thought of drugs – v enticing but no I said – I’ll be fine.
Well if you need them later you can come back.
I was really hoping I wouldn’t need to come back – he told me it was a 90 day ‘injury’ and I if I was going to go over on my ankle and completely destroy it – it would be between now and January – Nice! Just walk carefully – no heels and no running for now. Oh dear – can feel more Cadbury Whispers coming on….
So after 4 and a half weeks I was able to put my foot in a takkie (South African term for runner, trainer, sandshoe etc) an exercise that was impossible a week before – and return to the gym and hand over the month old ice pack they had kindly given me the day of my injury. A venue which I am trying to rebuild my relationship with as it has caused me grief on more than one occasion since I have joined – not the least of which includes a monthly email (disguised as a newsletter) that includes my weight, blood pressure, BMI and body fat percentage – yes really! If you want to change the figures in it apparently you have to actually change your body…..
Managed a shortish session on a few machines and got out the door in a dignified manner (no sprawling or tears) within about an hour.
Result – ankle slightly swollen (no worse than at the end of preceeding days) iPhone – intact – VICTORY! I might go back tomorrow.